The Continued Fight

Friends it has been a very surreal few days as we have tried to settle back in at home and find a routine for our family amidst the necessities of Finn’s care and pain management. Daily it seems as if we are living in a nightmare dream world, detached from reality.

Trying to focus on the most basic of tasks is a monumental challenge amidst the care for Finn and the crushing weight of the situation in which we find ourselves. While we wait and pray for findings from pathology labs we continue to fight with all the integrative care we are able. IV infusions, supplements, “alternative” treatments… all of these are done with the desperate prayers and hopes of success, all the while not knowing for sure what is happening inside our little boy. Is the cancer responding, or does it continue to grow and consume more of his precious body? Minutes drag by as the anxiety of not knowing eats away at the edges of our sanity and patience. Knowing that it will take days and weeks to know for sure if our continued efforts are successful is agonizing when set in the context of not knowing how many days and weeks we have. Meanwhile, keeping Finn’s pain under control and helping his body to heal has been no small task. Little sleep, high stress, an underlying fear, and a constant striving to trust all of this to God’s promised faithfulness. This is by far the hardest phase or this journey yet…

In the middle of this we have been able to find some comfort in the company of loved ones who have come to visit, lend a hand, and share both meals and tears. One consistency through all of this has been the love and support of family and friends near and far which makes a world of difference

Now, in another setback, we find ourselves back in the hospital due to an infection at his epidural site. The primary means of pain control had to be removed to prevent an even more serious complication. Finn will start antibiotics to kill the infection, and should our efforts at controlling the pain without the epidural fail, we will have another (slightly different type) put in after 48 hours.

We pray that our stay will be short and Finns pain can continue to be managed. We are grateful for all of our Finns Fans team members at Vanderbilt and Mayo who continue to work tirelessly on Finn’s behalf. We pray we can soon be home again where we can all be together. We continue to pray for a miracle.